Comments on: Sad Sacks

By: Lane

Lane — Tue, 28 Dec 2004 17:04:00 +0000

We all have our vices, but smoking is one of worse [sic].

Boy, someone’s really not using their imagination.

By: Chuck

Chuck — Sun, 26 Dec 2004 11:39:00 +0000

Julian,

This is a dangerous game to play. Someone who wished you harm could pretend to be a well-meaning stick-in-the-mud. They could incessantly remind you about smoking’s reputed ill-effects until you’re sucking down 5 packs a day.

Don’t laugh, this type of puffery has led me to engage in foolhardy feats of competitive eating.

By: Micha Ghertner

Micha Ghertner — Sun, 26 Dec 2004 06:15:00 +0000

Julian,

Whenever some busybody informs that, “You know, cigarettes are really bad for you,” I sarcastically intone, “Really? Smoking is harmful to my health? Why the fuck didn’t someone tell me this sooner?”

If I was rich and wasteful, I’d immediately throw my cigarette on the ground and stomp it out for comedic effect. And then I’d light up another once they got the point.

By: Julian Sanchez

Julian Sanchez — Sat, 25 Dec 2004 00:17:00 +0000

I hereby pledge to up my tobacco consumption 5 percent each time some patronizing stranger presumes to instruct me on how to best conduct my affairs, apparently on the assumption that the downsides of smoking had somehow escaped me until now.

No, seriously… did this person expect me to strike palm to forehead in a “Eureka” moment upon noticing this comment and mend my ways? What fucking impudence.

By: Will Wilkinson

Will Wilkinson — Thu, 23 Dec 2004 09:20:00 +0000

Schtick,

When the nanotechnology lung-scrubbers arrive, won’t you feel like a fool!

By: Kevin B. O'Reilly

Kevin B. O'Reilly — Thu, 23 Dec 2004 05:56:00 +0000

Isn’t that Will smoking in the picture, though?

By: Cancer Schtick

Cancer Schtick — Thu, 23 Dec 2004 02:39:00 +0000

Julian is a very smart and handsome young man. But rest assured, if he doesn’t stop smoking he won’t be either for long. He’ll be just another sickly ugly guy with stained teeth and bad breath. There is nothing cool about smoking. It’s bad news all around. In this life you get just one body. So why fuck it up from head to toe? We all have our vices, but smoking is one of worse. Please stop, Julian.

By: Cancer Schtick

Cancer Schtick — Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000

By: Kevin B. O'Reilly

Kevin B. O'Reilly — Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000

Isn’t that Will smoking in the picture, though?

By: Will Wilkinson

Will Wilkinson — Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000

Schtick,

When the nanotechnology lung-scrubbers arrive, won’t you feel like a fool!